You were never in control



Sun 8.11.19


      What occurs when you stumble upon a moment of clarity, when you absolutely know something of what goes on behind the curtain?  You freak out, or you get depressed, and you experience in descending order the 5 stages of impending death.  Yes, you are in fact dying.  The you that is fitted so well to the society you live in, so well in fact, that there is no you without it, through some special dispensation is given a chance to escape society’s confines.  One is unencumbered of the world’s expectations, travelling through it like a shadow, unseen, untethered, in an actuality that is multidimensional, multigenerational. 

      The noise of everyday life overwhelms.  Did Jeffrey Epstein commit suicide?  Was there an attempted coup?  Our societal system is dependent on crisis; it is done purposely, or from an unconscious mechanism that creates chaos, motivating humans to do what they would not be inclined to, and does not lead to well-being, strength or happiness.  Crisis is a diversion from the actuality of life.  On a personal basis, it’s an excuse, an avoidance mechanism.  Better the crisis than . . . Is there a supra mind, what some have chosen to personify as a god?  It’s an intelligence that permeates all of existence.  Every living thing on this planet is sentient, has awareness, even stones, oceans, rain, snow, wind.  It believes itself human; all action is purposeful and interacts with the whole of the planet in a interlaced effort.  You were never in control, you have been interacting on a level that you are barely aware of.

      This dispensation has its costs; you can never go home again.  It never existed.  Made up as it was, of the stories you told yourself about what you thought, imagined, desired, feared, and saw was occurring.  It never happened.  You are walking alone on an empty planet strapped to a myth-making mind, in search of nurturance.  Be strong my friend, be strong.