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the pagans

After the vision quest I sought out people like Starhawk, the shaman, Michael Harner in an effort to not lose the experience I had undergone.

The Song’s Kismet

It’s your song, you love it, play it over and over,  You’re not sure what it means, but that’s not the point.  The song has taken you over.

l’amour

Valentine's Day, one of our grander illusions, is coming upon us shortly. The bullshit surrounding this holiday celebration of love . . .

the housewifes screed

       I’ve been a housewife since the age of 17-18.  Wherever I go I set up house.  It may be a camp in the woods, a two-bedroom house . . .

uniform field theory

“You're a sweetheart for bringing up the world of "paranormal" phenomena, Sasha. We are coming out of the closet; Yes, there is another way of being, another way of seeing,

I HAD A DREAM


I had a dream last night in which I am in a messy house.  There is a young man in it who wants a home.  I will take up his cause. 

psych theories

Jonathan Franzen’s book The Karl Kraus Project is a translation of essays written by Kraus, a 19th century Austrian essayist known in his time as the great hater.

bear tracks

I watch through the window as the van pulls into the driveway. He's completed the necessary work and we load up my twelve gauge shotgun, his thirty ot six, our provisions and clothes.

New York City

Driving across country on my way to Mexico, I came upon NYC on a night like you see in the picture above. I thought it was so gorgeous I doubled back and drove through it one more time.

the encounter

The person (TP) has come on an errand; we don’t know each other. In the course of our conversation TP offers help for a particular task needed. I reject this help . . .

hyperreality

Two books, “America” and “Simulations & Simulacrum” by Jean Baudrillard, a brilliant French academic in many disciplines, sociology, philosophy, and a voice in the field of semiotics.

Rite of Passage

The photo of Abraham Lincoln above is of a young man, strong-minded, determined and prepared to stand his truth and defend himself against an adversarial system.  

dinosaurs

You look at the dinosaurs in the lobby of the Museum of Natural History and it gives you pause.  

the unravelling

Sad, sad day for brothers and sisters in France as their country is being terrorized. The terror is metastasizing to other countries.

darkened Chambers

How does one reach a decision to commit, to a nunnery, to a musician’s nomadic life wandering from one engagement to another, to marry Henry and stand by him till death do you part?

the bully

I approach today’s essay on a subject most of us are, unfortunately, familiar with . . . the bully. Megyn Kelly has published an excellent video on YouTube . . .

The Mothers

On this Mother’s Day let me introduce you to the women in my family.

Clock-O’-Clay

The buildings facing me across the street where I lived on the Upper East Side of Manhattan were all elegant brownstones, except for Bob's house.

soulmate

What of the soulmate situation? Below are two examples of this rare phenomenon. The first is recounted by the 16th century philosopher and essayest Michel de Montaigne.

perspective

After divoce, I was out on my own in the world, I was in college, and in need of counseling to help with the transition. The man was a Jungian psychologist . .

SEDUCTION/DEFILEMENT

Think of it as man and woman in their embrace.  He is creativity approaching the woman, and she must decide if she will be the opening in which creation comes about

the great upheaval

Oh my America, my new found land, writes the poet John Donne in the poem, “To His Mistress Going To Bed.”  

personal power

The State needs power to function.  Presently, the US appears desperate to start a war with either Russia or China, or both.  

other

I remember when I was 5 or 6, sitting in the back seat of a car with a family whose daughter and I had just participated in an event; they were giving me a ride home.

the return trip

My storage space was flooded; it contained all of my worldly possessions.  You know, from the 48 hours pack-your-things and get out eviction.

Thoughts on New Year

My conduct may be ignorant but it is mine.  At some point I may discover that my specific action was not beneficial to me and I will not repeat it, but for now . . .

summary judgment

It is now 4 years 4 months since I took Landlord and his agent to court, and this week I handed in my response to Landlord’s Motion for Summary Judgment.

poverty 2.0

Below is a post from December 2008, during our last recession. I am living in NYC working in show biz. The recession by that time was fairly serious.

Sigma Nu and the Girls

I see the American Bar Association Is dropping the LSAT, the law school admission test.

Live Free

I-Ching oracle for the coming week has chosen the hexagram Ko: Revolution, Molting, to speak to us of the revolution at our door.

Stipulated Record

So what happened with the summary judgment motion my opponents presented? Judge had three choices.

Setting heart free

As I lay in bed last night it came to me that I was about to start on a new creative writing book, and what the book was about. I had been worried about whether I was ever going to leave the law courts

Kate and Louise

The sculpter Louise Nevelson was raised in Rockland, Maine where I presently reside and to which I intend to make my home if Spirit approves.

with boots on

It is now 3 years, 2 months in which I am in court with my now former landlord and its maintenance company. I was badly abused by these people.

monologues

Digging through the files of my Manhattan Seeress days I came on the four monologues I performed in my auditions for parts in show biz.

Communiqué from the trenches

I received an email from a friend in Manhattan I had not heard from in over five years yesterday.

searching for magic

I have survived one month, one week and 3 days of homelessness. This condition came about because I defied Landlord’s abuse.

homeless

It’s been a month since I last posted in the journal.  I’ve had my site for 24 years, and never missed a posting in the journal.  My last posting occurred on May 22.  On the next day I became homeless. 

the path of heart

If all that you believe in, money, status, possessions, rights, shuffle off, your sense of self develops separate from the group.

Transformation

Once you jump the hurdle and you know, I can’t explain it any better than that; you know. What is it that you know? You know that you’re Ok, that . . .

gardens

There is an ongoing battle with landlord about the gardens on his property. He likes flowers, I prefer vegetables. So we are in court.

witches’ familiar

Hello, I found your website by accident while I was searching for information on Shamanism. I am interested in obtaining a reading in the future.

dirty boy

Some marketer calls me; has a few questions to ask . Sure, why not. It's about politics, and the guy very shortly has me nailed as a liberal.

the path we choose

You have noticed that the United States appears to be in the midst of a revolution,

The Free lunch

The world has gone mad.  We all wear masks on our faces.  For self protection?  No, the mask’s intent is subjugation.

Elegant wits

I am reading a delightful book entitled Elegant Wits and Grand Horizontals about the Belle Epoche (beautiful era) in Paris

resurrection

I watched the new Matrix film, the other night and I’m here to tell you that I was sorely disappointed. Morpheus’ Larry Fishburne has been replaced by some jive guy

the squeeze

Notice how verbs have a way of becoming nouns. Take the verb squeeze, as in my squeeze, meaning my honey. I'm reading a book in which another ominous meaning has been attached to it.

the verdict is in

It has come about that certain groups in the country create violence, destroy property, especially in the big cities, some have been killed . . .

The twitter bird

I can’t stand the United States at this time; everybody’s crazy, trying to outgun the others. There is just this pure hatred for anyone who dares to speak . .

karma

     Last week’s essay I placed on Substack, (The Song’s Kismet,) on the power of a song gained me an offer to work at ChatGPT.

Animal Prints


It is four o'clock in the morning; a dreamlike stillness permeates the bedroom, whose only sound is Lucien's rhythmic breathing as he lays sleeping next to her,

Tribes

We approach 2024 with trepidation, but with a strong heart. Presently, there is a war with Ukraine, genocide of the Palestinian people occurs at pace, a war with the Houthis.

the note

There’s a clip on my feed at X.  It opens to a  scene taking place within a church, somber lighting, its congregants are chatting.  A couple appears, they walk slowly down the center aisle enter aisle hand in hand, Donald and Melania Trump, as everybody looks.

Be period.com

I have stumbled upon a school on the internet titled beperiod.com. Beperiod is what this school teaches. Just be.

salvia Divinorum

You must give up the world,” says the note in the center of the corkboard facing me at my desk.  I once smoked a perfectly legal hallucinogenic plant,

Life’’s Battering ram

“Capturing the Friedmans” a documentary about a family . . . Thanksgiving day, seated at the dinner table when a battering ram comes crashing through their front door.

And so wars

Let’s look at the United States’ present psychological frame of mind from a psychiatric perspective. I have worked as a Psychiatric Social Worker . . .

cosmic consciousness

 There are no words in our language to describe it accurately, and what words used lead one further away from what one is trying to grasp.

Bitchez

I am Bitch,  truly a bitch!  Any woman who asserts herself, demands her rights, note that I didn't say affirm, or maintain, has got to have a strong clit,

plus Ca Change,

Below is an essay by the actor Margot Kidder posted on the site Information Clearing House on the Democratic convention of 2016 and my response to it.

The candidates

Today I give you a three-card Tarot divination on the candidates: Biden, Trump, Kennedy and Ramaswamy.

Justice Thomas

Clarence Thomas is my hero.  We all love our dandies who float through life encountering few stumbling blocks along the way.

the art walk

Rockland being the art capital of Maine, every first Friday of the month from May to October, the Farnsworth Museum and the galleries open their doors . . .

this must be said

Colorado mom Lydia Lerma feels punched when she hears the trendy new term “minor-attracted person” for the crime of pedophilia. 

Girls of Summer


It’s summertime in Maine and the juice indicating how am reacting to it is best expressed by these joyful girls of summer dancing to Elvis’ All Shook Up.

bakhmut!

They have captured Bakhmut. What does this mean to Americans? It is not our war, But The Powers that Be decided back in 2014 that it was of some importance

npc

The term NPC is used in video games designating a character controlled by predetermined or responsive behavior as opposed to live players.  

manifesto

Audrey’s Manifesto

Mary

I believe that the soul knows of the coming of death and invites it. What is it Freud said -- There are no accidents? I think there are no surprises either. The ancient one, the soul's perceiver knows all that is coming.

the father

I am reading Saul Bellow’s It All Adds Up, which is a collection of essays. He’s a wonderful writer, erudite, wise, delightful. What I especially like . .

the right moment

As I sit on the bed, laptop in place, ready for this week’s essay to come to mind on this sunny day,  across the room, facing me are flowers basking, red opening onto pink

witches among us

Although smaller and weaker, woman has power over the much stronger man.  She has mesmerized him, and can entice him to take a bite . . .

Théo et sa belle

After a Saturday night of drinking and dancing, we all meet at Léon's place in the morning.  Raymond wants to go to the movies.  'What's playing?" Théo asks.  

this is my house

How does one return from battle to a peaceful life?  Often we hear of soldiers returning home and finding themselves completely unable to acclimatize,

2023

WISHING YOU THE BEST, OR AT LEAST BETTER, FOR 2023

LUHRENLOUP

the shamans

I have worked with the shaman Michael Harner with the witch Starhawk,. and also the greatest influence on my life, Carlos Castaneda’s sorcerer, Don Juan.

A court Reporter

The difference between state and federal court hearings is the difference between a hockey game and a figure skating competition.

Kübler-Ross, Election

The the mid-term election as seen and experienced through the Kübler-Ross grief cycle:

The pool player

Once upon a time long ago there was a program on television entitled 60 Minutes (I think its still running.).  

Sophie Laurent

As you can see from the image above, I’ve gone back to working for the psychic lines . . . Sophie Laurent? You can’t use your real or professional name;

a friend

Johnny lived down the road from my home in the country. We were introduced when he came over one Saturday noon asking for a ride to the village which was about a mile away.

THE DESCENDANTS

It’s becoming obvious to most that things are not well in the United States, and our Constitution is failing us. All three branches are not fulfilling their mandate.

RUSSKIY MIR

President Putin has recently spoken about the “Russian World,” Russkiy mir. This concept originated with Vladislav Surkov.

potlatch

We are enslaved to the money people. Every rule, every law is for the benefit of money people who have deep thoughts on making more . .

utopia is beyond us

Why isn’t the world like university communities, I wonder, where idealistic people pursue an understanding of the world, its people and their history . . .

Commitment

Tell me Sister (or Brother), did you wonder as you were on point of making your commitment, about the door forever shutting behind you . .

The law of the mean

The commonsense observation that probability influences everyday life so that over the long term the possible outcomes . .

homeless II

It started probably a week after I moved in, management came to me and said there was a complaint, I was making too much noise (I am hard of hearing.) My music was too loud

. . . rots from head

Things have gotten progressively worse out there. We’’re shortly to experience a famine; driving your car now costs, gas wise, hundreds of dollars. Biden says the Covid masks are going back on . . .

personal Power

Personal power is attained through the conquest of fear. One’s ability to do that is dependent on how many stressors impinge on one’s life.

ostara

Behold, my friends the spring is come; The earth has gladly received the embraces of the sun, and we shall soon see the results of their love!”

the fear factor

My grocery bill went up twenty bucks this week, whoa! Gee, I miss boredom, laying around, trying to figure out what to do “to keep myself occupied.”

hot to trot

I'm hot as the devil at a Sunday sermon and having dreams about snakes in my bed, men telling me they can't stay away from me.

I want . . .

  I want dinner cooked to perfection, my companions should be talented, amusing, I want the table conversation to be witty and a bit ribald.

law school?

I suppose I have to own up to it. I’ve been in court for, it will be 3 years this coming spring.. Presently, in federal court,

the galaxies

Snow, snow, snow and hurricane type winds blowing it about like crazy yesterday. The 4 elements of our universe . . .

puberty

Sister Stanislaus of the Order of the Sisters of Charity was the Superior in charge of us convent girls.

tonal, nagual

Making resolutions is serious business and should never be undertaken if not followed through.

Promote Yo’self

It's been a week-end in which the truth of publishing descends on me like an anvil falling from a 10th story window. It is about publicity. . ..

Fight the power

The government's weapon is fear. We are controlled by its endless fear mongering -- we're going to run out of food; we're going to run out of money;

the problem

Out for a run, I come across several signs on folks’ lawns about Black Lives Matter with a slew of other writing in smaller script below I wonder about these signs.

Orwell’s top ten

10 George Orwell Quotes That Predicted Life In 2021 America 1) “In our age there is no such thing as ‘keeping out of politics.’